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Choosing to stay home

Deciding whether to work or stay at home to raise a family is a difficult choice for women. Younger moms who have just started to launch their careers and established career women who are contemplating time at home with their families have more in common than they think. Both must determine what ultimately will work best for themselves and their families.

Here are some points to consider as you review your options:

One size does not fit all

Does it seem that everyone you know has become a stay-at-home mom? This must mean you should stay at home with your children too, right? Not necessarily. You know yourself better than anyone else. Will you feel fulfilled if you leave your career behind? Are you prepared to exchange daily power lunches for daily power struggles?

Be honest with yourself

If you have severe doubts about your ability to handle the challenges of being a stay-at-home mom, then don't be so quick to chuck your high heels and briefcase. Instead, consider trying the stay-at-home test. Take your two-week vacation at home this year and get a glimpse of life as a stay-at-home mom. If you like how it feels, submit your letter of resignation. If it doesn't feel right for you, then return to work knowing that for now, working outside the home full or part-time is the right decision for you.

It?s a family affair

Your decision affects all family members, so get their input before you cast the final vote. Invite them to a family meeting and briefly discuss the options you are considering. Ask for their opinions. This approach will put you in a much better position to make a decision you can live with, because you can incorporate their needs and desires into your decision.

Review your finances

Family finances sometimes can make the decision for you. Your income may be needed to maintain the status quo.

But are you and your family happy with the status quo?

Would you be more content at work if you knew you were working by choice and not necessity?

Would you be willing to forego that new minivan in exchange for an opportunity to be at home with your kids?

Take control of your life. Meet with a financial planner to see if you can whip your finances into shape. A little belt tightening here and there will put you in a much better position regardless of which path you choose.

Look for the grey area

Some people only think in terms of black and white. You are either a full-time stay-at-home mom or you work in an office 40-plus hours a week. But look a little bit harder, and you will see shades of grey. A number of women have chosen to keep feet in both worlds. They may work part-time, do volunteer or part-time work or even start their own businesses so they can have the flexibility they need to care for their families as well as have a satisfactory work life.

Don?t look back

It's a good idea to re-evaluate your situation from time to time, because family needs change, but don't keep second-guessing yourself. You will know when the decision you made is no longer right for you and your family, and you can always make changes.

For more advice log on to www.monsterindia.com

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