So you always thought that women fall for bad boys, right? That women are suckers for mega-watt machismo and if that big, beautiful hunk of male is aggressive, arrogant and a sexual marauder to boot, they go weak in the knees at the mere prospect of getting up close and personal with him. It’s why you’d probably think that a guy like Salman Khan, he of the dreamy eyes and straining biceps, whose sexual conquests are legion and whose run-ins with the law famous, would be every woman’s bad boy fantasy come true.

Well, we polled 60 women (most of them in Calcutta, a few of them in Bangalore and Delhi) between the ages of 20 and 50 to find out if that perception was correct, and an overwhelming 82 per cent of them said they could never fall in love with a man like Salman Khan. Though 56 per cent said they found him sexy, 70 per cent felt they wouldn’t even care to have an affair with a man like him. Marriage was not acceptable either, with 81 per cent asserting that a person like the superbrat movie star was much too “unreliable” to venture into matrimony with. The poll was conducted over telephone and over a period of three days.

But why pick on Salman, you may ask. That’s simply because Salman Khan today has become the national poster boy for testosterone-fuelled shenanigans. He’s been in trouble for the killing of endangered animals, he allegedly beat up his girlfriend (he’s also known to have emptied a bottle of Coke on a former girlfriend’s head) and he’s roughed up sundry paparazzi. In 2002, he ran over and killed a pavement dweller in Mumbai with his drunk driving, and lately, he’s been in the eye of a storm because he’s allegedly been caught on tape boasting of his underworld connections and threatening and abusing his then girlfriend Aishwarya Rai.

And yet his star value shines brighter than ever, his latest movie Maine Pyar Kyun Kiya looks set to be a hit and his fans, mostly female, as was evident at the recent IIFA awards in Amsterdam, scream for him wherever he goes.

But obviously, idolisation from afar is one thing and contemplating a relationship with a man like Salman is quite something else. “Salman Khan is far too emotional and is guided by his instincts rather than his brains,” says Meenal Arora, manager, Kotak Mahindra Old Mutual Life. “A man like him wouldn’t respect women. He’d be unstable and quite unsuitable for a long-term relationship.” Adds Trinity, a deejay in a Calcutta restobar, “A guy like him is just eye candy. I wouldn’t be in my right mind to fall in love with an unreliable character like that.”

Comments such as these and the findings of our poll certainly seem to punch a hole in the commonly-held belief that women are eternally susceptible to those gorgeous jerks who, poor dears that they are, can’t help their occasional bouts of erratic (read horrendous) behaviour. Incidentally, a Harris Interactive survey on what people look for in the opposite sex published in the conservative US newspaper Washington Times on April 7 this year also said that while most women liked “manly” men, as much as 92 per cent of them felt that “dependability” was an important characteristic in their ideal mate.

So is this “women love bad boys” adage nothing but a myth? A convenient romantic construct that encourages a woman to believe that a dominant male, even if he cheats on her and pushes her around, is somehow more attractive than the proverbial nice guy?

“It certainly suits men to have women subscribe to the notion that so-called bad boys are irresistible,” says Saswati Ghosh, women’s activist and professor of economics at City College, Calcutta. “It gives them a licence for bad behaviour, and makes them believe, just as it makes women believe, that as long as they are charming, their irresponsible behaviour is not just acceptable ? it is downright attractive.”

Ghosh believes that it is a tremendously positive sign that women are turning their back on mindless machismo. “It’s a sign of their growing emancipation that they’re seeking equal and responsible partners,” she says.

Of course, there have always been women who’ve felt the pull of the alpha male who walks on the wild side. Take Hollywood’s notorious bad boy actor Billy Bob Thornton, for instance. He’s run through five marriages (Angelina Jolie was wife no. 5) despite charges of spousal abuse. And our very own Salman Khan has his blissed-out band of would-be lovers as well. “Salman is very cute,” says Bony Sen, a teacher. “He is just a victim of circumstances. I feel bad for him and would love to date him, have an affair with him and yes, even marry him.”

But for every woman who thinks a fling with Billy Bob Thornton or Salman Khan is something to die for, there are thousands who’d rather steer clear of men like them. As psychiatrist Dr Debashis Ray points out, “Women are obviously not uniform in their responses. Who will click with whom depends on a complex chemistry of emotions between two people.” Though he claims that the incidence of multiple sexual partners among Indian women is actually on the rise, Dr Ray concedes that if a poll indicates that a lot of women are loath to have a relationship with a famous but seemingly unreliable man, it’s probably because they will not settle for someone who is “bad”. “Security and permanence are important to women and these stereotypes continue to persist in spite of globalisation and in spite of the gradual merger of gender roles in our society,” he says.

But in the final analysis, the result of this poll is not about junking one feminine stereotype in favour of another. The point is that women of today are looking beyond their socially-given definitions. It’s okay for different women to want different things ? the demon lover or the perfect doormat. The days of fanciful generalisations about what women want or need are finally over.